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The Rules of Combat

• Friendly fire - isn't.
• Recoilless rifles - aren't.
• Suppressive fires - won't.
• If the enemy is in range, so are you.
• If you can see the enemy, they can see you.
• No plan survives the first contact intact.
• You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.
• A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
• If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
• Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.



• If at first you don't succeed, call for artillery. When that doesn't work, call for an air strike.
• The further you are in advance of your own positions, the more likely your artillery will fall short.
• Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
• Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
• Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
• If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
• The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.
• The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: a) when they're ready, b) when you're not.
• No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy.
• There is no such thing as a perfect plan.



• Five second fuses always burn in three seconds.
• There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
• A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
• The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
• The problem with taking the easy way out is that the enemy has already mined it.
• Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
• Don't look conspicuous. In the combat zone, it draws fire. Out of the combat zone, it draws sergeants. This is why aircraft carriers are called bomb magnets.
• Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.
• If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
• When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.



• Incoming fire has the right of way.
• No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
• No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
• If the enemy is within range, so are you.
• The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
• Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.
• Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.
• Radios will fail as soon as you desperately need fire support.
• Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.
• Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.



• Tracers work both ways.
• If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.
• When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right.
• Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
• When your fear of the plane overcomes your fear of the ejection seat, its time to 'punch out.'
• It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.
• Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
• Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
• Anything you do can get you shot. Including doing nothing.
• The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.



• Weather ain't neutral.
• If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you.
• Air defence motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.
• 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go.
• The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
• Napalm is an area support weapon.
• Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
• B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
• Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.
• Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.



• The one item you need is always in short supply.
• Interchangeable parts aren't.
• It's not the one [bullet] with your name on it; it's the one [bullet or shrapnel] addressed 'to whom it may concern' or 'occupant' that you've got to worry about.
• When in doubt, empty your magazine.
• The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
• The army with the smartest dress uniform will lose.
• Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps...printed at different scales.
• If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
• Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when you can sleep.
• The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.



• Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.
• Everything always works in your HQ, everything always fails in the Colonel's HQ.
• The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
• One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.
• A clean (and dry) set of Battle Dress Uniforms is a magnet for mud and rain.
• The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.
• Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you never miss. Whenever you are low on ammo, you can't hit the broad side of a barn.
• The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
• Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
• No matter which way you have to march, it's always uphill.



• If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything.
• For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
• Air strikes always overshoot the target, artillery always falls short.
• When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down, the most important ones are always illegible.
• Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.
• Body count math: two guerillas plus one portable plus two pigs equals 37 enemy KIA.
• The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want, but they know for certain what they don't want.
• The enemy only attacks on one of two occasions: When you're ready for them, and when you're not ready for them.
• To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
• The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the M60.



• The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
• When you have sufficient supplies & ammo, the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack.. When you are low on supplies & ammo the enemy decides to attack that night.
• The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Medal of Honour.
• A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
• Murphy was a grunt.
• Beer math: two beers times 37 men equal 49 cases.
• Body count Math - 3 guerrillas plus 1 probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemies killed in action.
• The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.
• The effective radius of a hand grenade is greater the average grunt can throw it.
• All-weather close air support doesn't work in bad weather.
• The combat worth of a unit is inversely proportional to the smartness of its outfit and appearance.
• The crucial round is a dud.
• Every command which can be misunderstood, will be.



• There is no such place as a convenient foxhole.
• Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
• If your positions are firmly set and you are prepared to take the enemy assault on, he will bypass you.
• If your ambush is properly set, the enemy won't walk into it.
• If your flank march is going well, the enemy expects you to outflank him.
• Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.
• Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.
• The more stupid the leader is, the more important missions he is ordered to carry out.
• The self-importance of a superior is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness).
• There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.



• Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the General is watching.
• The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.
• Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight, your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away, and your canteen always lands at your feet.
• When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
• As soon as you are served hot chow in the field, it rains.
• Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.
• The seriousness of a wound (in a fire-fight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.
• Walking point = sniper bait.
• Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.
• If only one solution can be found for a field problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.



• The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.
• The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.
• If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.
• The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
• There is nothing more satisfying than having someone take a shot at you, and miss.
• All battles are fought uphill.
• All battles are fought in the rain.
• Logistics is the ball and chain of armoured warfare.
• What gets you promoted from one rank, gets you killed in the next rank.
• A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.



• If orders can be misunderstood, they have been.
• "War is like love. To triumph, you must make contact." -- attributed to Napoleon
• Boldness becomes rarer, the higher the rank.
• Never reinforce failure. Failure reinforces itself.
• Only 5% of an intelligence report is accurate. The trick of a good commander is to isolate the 5%.
• When a front line soldier overhears two General Staff officers conferring, he's fallen back too far.
• It isn't necessary to be an idiot to be a senior officer, but it sure helps.
• No captain can do very wrong who places his ship alongside that of the enemy.
• Only numbers can annihilate.
• Always know when to get out of 'Dodge'.
• Priorities are made by officers, not God. There's a difference.



• Always honour a threat.
• The weight of all your equipment is proportional to the cube of the time you have been carrying it.
• Hell hath no fury like a non-combatant.
• Fighter pilots make movies; attack pilots make history.
• There are two kinds of naval vessels: submarines and targets.
• A lost battle is a battle one thinks one has lost.
• Surprise is an event that takes place in the mind of a commander.
• All warfare is based upon deception.
• A little caution outflanks a large cavalry.
• Radios function perfectly until you need fire support.



• Parade ground inspections are to combat readiness as mess hall food is to cuisine.
• Snow is not neutral.
• The tank is a monument to the inaccuracy of indirect fire.
• Diplomacy has rarely been able to gain at the conference table what cannot be gained or held on the battlefield.
• War is the unfolding of miscalculations.
• Perfect is the enemy of good enough.
• He who wants to defend everything defends nothing.
• If they're shooting at you, it's a high intensity conflict.
• Artillery add dignity to what would otherwise be a vulgar brawl.
• Minefields are not neutral. They attack both enemies.
• Your mortar barrage will put exactly one round on the intended target. That round will be a dud.
• The mortar team will always have the correct number of safety pins to prove they armed all the rounds.
• More aircraft are incapacitated by a shortage of spare parts than by enemy action.
• Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.
• If it moves, shoot it.
• If it doesn't move, poke it with your gun barrel and then shoot it.
• Overkill works.